Everlasting Bonds Novel – Emilia I stepped out of my apartment and tried to resist the urge to look over my shoulder. The early morning September air was chilly but had the promise of a warm day ahead. I tucked my key into the hidden pocket of my backpack and made my way to the subway station. Most people hated how crowded the subway was. I reveled in it. Being lost in the crowd gave me a sense of safety and ambiguity. No one was looking at me because there were too many people to notice. I stepped out of the station and looked around at my surroundings. New York City. A place that 8 million people call home, and now I’m one of them. As I pass by bodega’s, coffee shops, and restaurants the reality of my situation starts to hit me. For the first time in 15 years, I’m on my own, and for the first time in almost ten years, I’m free.
No more sleeping on the floor of a cold basement, no more fists, and knives. No more torture and no more pain. I notice the faces of the people I pass by are getting blurry, and I blink quickly to stop the tears that are threatening to spill over. You are not in that place anymore, they are in jail. You have control of your life now. I repeat those words to myself as I steel myself for the day ahead. It’s my first day at NYU and my skin is almost vibrating with the possibilities. I always wanted to live in New York City and go to school here. I wish I was doing this with them. The thought creeps into my head before I can stop and I feel my heart sink a little. No matter how hard I try to forget them I can’t. Even though they probably forgot about me or blame me for what happened, I know I will always carry them with me. When I was taken, my life was inferno.
Some days the only thing keeping me going was the memories I shared with them. That was why I got a tattoo of a Lark bird on my inner wrist. I never knew why they called me that, but the memory of their affection was the driving force behind getting that image permanently on my body. It was one of the first things I did after I finally got settled into my studio apartment a few weeks ago. I finally made my way onto campus and took in my surroundings. The beautiful buildings and landscaping greeting me with open arms and the promise of something I thought I’d never get: a future. “Hello everyone and welcome to your first class of a brand new semester. I understand that writing may not be everyone’s favorite past time but it is a necessity…”.
A collective chuckle eased out of the students in the lecture hall as we listened to Dr. Cartwright’s introduction. “Please feel free to just call me Cartwright, I don’t like getting hung up on any of that doctor nonsense. I only got the degree so I could get paid a wage that makes living in this city manageable”. That time he got full-out laughter from most of the students. I was starting to think I was going to enjoy my time in this class when he walked in. Like a ghost or a daydream. I couldn’t quite tell if he was real or just something my imagination made up. Greyson Trent strolled into the room and sat in the first row. A roaring sound erupted in my head like the sound you hear when you put a conch shell up to your ear. “Ahhh, Greyson! Thank you for joining us this morning. Could you please come up here so I can introduce you to the class?”.
Cartwright spoke to Greyson with a fondness and I could tell they had known each other for a while. Grey got up to stand next to Cartwright and my breath caught in my throat. He was the boy I remembered, but now he was so much more. He had gotten taller and his trademark curls had been cut shorter to his head instead of shaggy. I suddenly felt too hot and my hair that I had let hang loosely down my back, felt like it was suffocating me. I unzipped my backpack, silently cursing at the loud sound in the quiet lecture hall, and grabbed a hair tie. As I sat back up and raised my arms to tie my hair back, I noticed that Greyson was staring at me. I quickly averted my eyes and focused on Cartwright speaking. “Everyone, meet Greyson. Greyson, meet everyone. He will be my TA for the course this semester and I trust his judgment implicitly. He is an extremely talented writer and I know that you all will learn just as much, if not more, from him as you will from me”.
Cartwright’s words settled over the lecture hall. Greyson gave a quick wave and started speaking. I couldn’t even hear it. Not over the sound of my heart attempting to beat out of my chest. He couldn’t be here. He can’t know me anymore. Not after everything that’s happened and everything I’ve done. I could feel my heart breaking as I realized what I would have to do. I had to leave. Pack up and find someplace else to start over. If my captors ever found me again and they hurt Grey because of it I would never forgive myself. After testifying against them I know they wouldn’t leave me alive. I couldn’t risk Greyson’s safety. Not again. Greyson finished speaking and went to sit back down. Even though I was avoiding his gaze, I could feel his eyes searing through me as he walked to his seat. Searching for the girl he used to know.
The rest of the class went by in a blur. Cartwright talked about the syllabus and answered any questions students had about the course. He ended early after wishing us luck for the rest of the day. As I was quickly packing up my things, I heard Wyatt trying to get my attention. “Emmy do you want to get a coffee or something? My next class isn’t for another hour and it’s only a block away from here”. Wyatt was already packed up, one hand in his pocket and the other on his backpack strap. I thought about saying no at first. Why start this friendship if I wasn’t intending on staying to see it through. I saw Greyson start to move towards me from the first row and made my decision. “Yeah, that would be great. I forgot to brew a pot this morning and I’m in desperate need of caffeine”. While none of that was a lie, my real reason was to give myself an out to escape Greyson.
We made our way out from the aisle and began walking to the door. Wyatt led the way and I was hoping he would act as a buffer to Grey’s approach. I should have known that wouldn’t work. As we passed him, my eyes focused straight ahead, he said my name. “Lark?” His voice was hushed and so much deeper than I remembered. My knees wanted to give out at hearing the old nickname that the guys gave me. The tattoo on my wrist felt itchy all of sudden, even though it was almost healed. I kept walking, hating myself the whole time. “Mia?” This time his voice was louder. He ran to catch up to Wyatt and me. This time Wyatt realized Grey was trying to talk to me and stepped up to my side. “Sorry man, this is Emily. I think you got the wrong girl”. At that moment I was so grateful for this strange boy. I think my voice would have cracked and given me away if I had attempted to speak to Grey. I felt Wyatt put his hand in mine and lead me out of the classroom.
I immediately pulled away. Touch was something that always came with pain, and I didn’t know this boy well enough to feel comfortable with this. Greyson’s eyes clocked the movement before meeting mine again. I gave him a smile and shrug as if to say, sorry for the mix-up, before I followed Wyatt outside. I couldn’t shake the feeling of Greyson’s eyes watching us as we made our way down the sidewalk. — Greyson I almost didn’t see her. She was sitting five rows away from me and I almost didn’t see her. When I walked in, I was so distracted by my tardiness that I quickly scanned the room before sitting down. It wasn’t until I got up to stand by Cartwright that I heard a noise and looked in her direction.
The girl searching through her things seemed so familiar to me. Like a word that’s on the tip of your tongue. When she sat up, she caught my eye so briefly before looking away. I was about to look away as well when I caught sight of the tattoo on her inner wrist. It was a bird. A Lark. If her sleeves hadn’t been pushed up I wouldn’t have taken a second look. I would have lost her all over again without realizing it. That tattoo made me look a little closer. Her hair was darker, and I realized that was the feature that initially threw me off. Her hair used to be golden and sun-pecked. Now it was dark, with highlights of blonde scattered throughout. Her lips were fuller. Stretching into a plush line that made me bite my lip.
Her eyes were what concerned me. Mia was our sun and her eyes always had a spark of curiosity and joy. I couldn’t find that spark anywhere, and I felt my hands form fists in my pockets. It was her. Emilia, Mia, Lark. Our Lark. They both started to walk towards the door when I called out her name. The name only we called her. Lark. I could tell she heard me because her shoulders stiffened slightly and her footsteps faltered. But she kept walking. As if she didn’t hear me. When I tried again, hoping Mia would catch her attention, she finally stopped as I caught up to her. The boy she was with stepped up next to her and looked at me as if I was invading his territory. The jealously I felt at that moment threatened to choke me.
“Sorry man, this is Emily. I think you got the wrong girl”. His voice was like nails on a chalkboard to me. When she finally met my eyes I knew that she remembered me. I could see it, but she still just shrugged and walked away. Why is she calling herself Emily? Why is she ignoring me? None of this made sense. Lark would never forget us, and judging by her tattoo we still meant something to her. Something permanent. I walked out after them and watched them walk away down the sidewalk. It took everything in me not to chase after her. I could not lose her again. None of us could.