Not Us 4: Graham and Haven Novel – I’m done with it. I will not be sharing my husband with another woman. “Look, Tay is in a tight spot financially, so I told her about a month or so ago that she could move in here temporarily.” He was always running to help his ex, Taylor, with everything! I always tried to understand. Now he’s moving that woman, his ex-wife, into our home? Our safe space? Our home?! “I’ll pay for a long-stay hotel for her for a month so she can figure it out…” “Don’t start Haven…come on,” he ran his hands through his dark hair. “It’ll be a good thing for Arnie to have his family together.” “Nate. You know she and I don’t get along and I mean…babe. This is our home.” “It’s temporary, Havi. Temporary. She’ll be out in six months.” My eyes grow large at that. “You expect me to put up with that woman for six months?! In my home?!” I get loud. I don’t care who can hear now. I. Am. Pissed. “Don’t be heartless! This is my home. That’s final!” “You do this, and I swear to god Nathan, I will leave you and take everything I deserve!”
Haven’s POV I’d been having problems with my husband, Nathan for months. We’d been arguing over just little stuff, like laundry, taking the trash out, and putting the dishes in the sink and his son. It was like Nathan was pushing back against me on every little thing lately. It wasn’t very pleasant. And he was always running to help his ex, Taylor, with everything! She would call him for everything, and I do mean everything. A lightbulb needs to be changed? Miraculously it’s too high for her to reach and she needs him. Toilet not flushing properly? Call Nathan, he’ll drop everything to be there! The things he should have been doing here, at our home, he was doing at hers. She and her boyfriend had just recently broken up.
Like, six months ago, recently. And all of a sudden she couldn’t do anything herself. And, of course, I needed to be understanding because I had him and who did she have? Except, I didn’t have him. Not really. I wanted to tell him she had him, and I was the one who didn’t have him here because he was with her all the time, but I couldn’t. Because sometimes his son, Arnold, wanted him to be there for things. How do I get mad at an eight-year-old? You don’t. Nathan and I had been married for a solid two years. Not long, but long enough to know when he was acting off. I know he and his ex had divorced because raising a child added stress to them both, and it became too much. He and I met a year after the divorce was finalized, so I never thought of myself as a ‘rebound’ but honestly, with how much he’s over there, I feel like a third party in my own marriage.
I asked him to come home early from work today so we could talk. There were some things we needed to discuss. Boundaries that needed to be put in place. I’m not going to be a single, married person living in our home, basically alone, if he continues this thing. I’ll walk away. I’m too good for this thing. Haven: We need to talk tonight, Nathan. Please come home early. I waited for thirty minutes before I started tidying up around the house, waiting as the time ticked closer to when he was supposed to be home, and I still hadn’t heard from him. Five-thirty came and went. By eight-thirty, I was sure he wasn’t coming home until late. I had already cleaned up the dinner I made for us and made my way outside.
I pulled my phone out, calling him again, straight to voicemail. Cool. Thanks. Just as I was sitting down outside with a glass of wine in front of the gas fire pit I bought last year, for fun fall times for us as a little family, I heard the front door open. I didn’t even bother turning around to see who it was. It was either Nathan or Arnie. Nathan came out, tie undone and draped around his neck. I looked at him. He looked tired but happy. “What did you want to talk about babe? It’s been a long day.” He sat down on the chair across from me, clasping his hands together, and resting his elbows on his knees. I just stared at him. Really? I asked him to come home early. Since when is almost nine o’clock early? “Where were you?” His eyes shifted as he sat up slighting and scratching the back of his neck. Great. With her. I didn’t even need him to tell me. I already know.
I let out a heavy sigh. She was the main point of contention in our marriage. The woman has never liked me. It wasn’t horrible when she had a boyfriend, but she would still pick at me. Over the dumbest thing too! It was little things. Like, we hosted Christmas our first year together and offered for her to come over since she doesn’t have a lot of family, and she said things like, ‘Oh. This is…nice. Quaint.’ Or she’d say things like, ‘I’ve never had Italian food for Christmas. This is a unique way of celebrating.’ I had spent hours in the kitchen for days preparing to host my first Christmas and this was the thanks I got. I would always tell Nathan how much it bothered me when she would say things like that, whether in front of him or not, but he would just brush it off with a, ‘She’s trying to be nice, why can’t you?’ I’m done with it. I will not be sharing my husband with another woman. “I was helping Tay finish raking some leaves in the backyard and Arnie needed help with some homework.”
The homework I can understand. The not texting me about it, I can’t. “I see,” I said, looking into the propane-fueled flames in front of me. The anger is surging so fiercely in me that I’m honestly trying not to start crying. I’m so over this. Just as I’m about to open my mouth to talk to him about the boundaries I want to set with him and her, he sticks his foot all the way in his mouth. He plops back on the seat, head falling back making him look even more tired than he did a minute ago. Probably knowing what type of conversation I want to have with him. “Look,” he starts, “I want to talk to you about something.” I look at him, setting my glass of wine down on the patio. Whatever it is, it’s important and it looks like he’s been thinking about it for a while. “Look, Tay is in a tight spot financially, so I told her about a month or so ago that she could move in here temporarily until she could get back on her feet.” What? I looked at him like he had just grown another head.
There is no way he said what I think he said. I did not just hear that. “Excuse me? I think I heard you wrong.” I’ll give him another chance to clear this up. He looks me dead in the eyes as he says, “She’s moving in. In two weeks. I’m going to start cleaning up the guest room for her tomorrow.” No way. I take a deep breath. He’s moving that woman, his ex-wife, into our home? Our safe space? Our home?! Think. Think. What can I do to get her to not come here? “I’ll pay for a long-stay hotel for her for a month so she can figure it out. What about that? I understand her being in a tight spot since the break-up, but moving her in here is…a bit…” “Don’t start Haven…come on,” he ran his hands through his dark hair. “It’ll be a good thing for Arnie to have his family together, and it’ll show him how we help those in need.” Okay? Maybe I didn’t make my point clear enough.
“What if I pay the deposit and two months rent of an apartment for her? I do not want her here, under any circumstances, Nate. You know she and I don’t get along and I mean…babe. This is our home,” I try to keep my voice steady and I try to keep it down as anger and pain surged harder than before through my veins. We’re outside, it’s only early October. People like to keep the windows open at night for the cool air. “It’s temporary, Havi. Temporary. She’ll be out in six months.” My eyes grow large at that. Six months?! “Six months?! You expect me to put up with that woman for six months?! In my home?!” I get loud. I don’t care who can hear now. I. Am. Pissed. I get up and start walking inside, no longer in the mood for a fire outside. I grabbed my glass of wine and downed the whole thing, setting it on the countertop.
“Don’t be heartless! This is my home. That’s final!” I hear him shouting at me from outside as he turns off the firepit. His home?! “You do this, and I swear to god Nathan, I will leave you and take everything I deserve!” I pinned him where he stood in the doorway with a glare that I hoped would make him burst into flames. He glared back at me. “I never took you for such a cold, heartless bimbo,” with that, he walked past me and went upstairs. I stood where I was. Mouth open. Completely flabbergasted. He did not just say that. I went to my office on the first floor and pulled out the Murphy bed we use when we have more than one guest staying with us. As I set up to stay the night in there, the thoughts wouldn’t stop. Am I cold-hearted? Am I being heartless? I offered other solutions, that don’t include her staying here.
Why is he so bent on her coming here? Is there something going on with them? I pulled out my phone and called my cousin Jude. “Hey cuz. What’s up?” She sounded slightly distracted. My news would definitely bring her back to this conversation. “Nathan’s moving his ex-wife in.” I wait. Hearing crickets on her end of the line. “I’m sorry. I think we have a bad connection. What did you just say?” She sounded confused but in a defensive kind of way. “In two weeks. He’s going to start cleaning the guest room tomorrow.” “Okay. Now I know I had to have misheard you. Did you just say he’s moving his ex-wife in? To your marital home? Regardless that it’s the guest room?” I nodded even though she couldn’t see me, tears streaming silently down my face. I sniffled, trying to keep quiet so he wouldn’t hear me on the phone, “I offered to either pay for an apartment for a few months, or a long-stay hotel for a month. He said I was being a heartless bimbo.” “You are!” I heard her rage.
“Wait. Did he actually use the words, ‘heartless bimbo’?” “I believe it was, ‘cold, heartless bimbo’, but yeah. Pretty much.” “Prick” She was like an angry Pitbull anytime someone messed with her family. She would do anything to make her family feel better. I’m so thankful she’s not only my cousin but my best friend. “What’s the plan?” “I told him I’m leaving if he moves her in.” “Good. I’ll call Uncle Sal.” I could tell she was on a warpath. “Please don’t involve him yet. I’m going to try talking to him again tomorrow.” I was starting to think I might be able to resolve this. I’ll even call her and make the same offers. Anything to keep her out of my home. Away from me and my husband unless Arnie was involved. “You need to be on top of this, Haven. If you only have two weeks until he brings her in…And, frankly, you need to get your ducks all in a pretty little row to leave. That’s not a lot of time.” I did know it wasn’t a lot of time. But felt I needed to give it my all before I gave up, “You know Uncle Sal is the one to get it done.” It’s true. Two weeks wasn’t a long time.
“Uncle Sal might also try to break out some cement shoes.” Wait. How long ago did he tell her she could move in? She laughed at that. “He wouldn’t be wrong for it. You know he loves us kids like his own.” I smiled at that because we all knew. Ever since our aunt was killed in a car accident years ago, pregnant with their child, he’d been alone. He treated all of us cousins like we were his own kids, not his nieces and nephews. He always said he didn’t need anyone but us. “He told her a month ago she could move in.” “This just keeps getting better and better for that prick. Please…call Uncle Sal tomorrow. You need a good attorney.” “I know.” And I did.